Chapter 1: Chapter 1
The first time I saw him, he was leaning against the wall next to the elevator. He had an air of mystery about him. Mystery' is a bit of an exaggeration. I knew he was tall, dark, and good looking from the moment I saw him, but'mystery' is what I wanted him to be.I wanted him to be mysterious. I wanted him to be sexy. I wanted him to be a bad boy.
I didn't get my wish he turned out to be nothing more than a well groomed businessman. Not bad looking, but not jaw dropping either. His dark hair was neatly combed and he wore a suit that did nothing for his physique. Nothing at all.I was expecting a god, not a man.
Mystery' is what I wanted him to be. He was tall, dark, and good looking' is not enough to describe him. He was sensual, he was hot, there was something about him that made me want him even though I knew he was wrong for me. It was the way he carried himself.The way he stood. The way he smiled. It was the way he looked at me. It was the way he made me feel. I felt special". I felt like I was the only one he cared about. He was my husband and I loved him, but I longed for adventure. I longed for a life more exciting than my own. So I cheated on my husband.I went out and picked up men for group sex.
It wasn't like I didn't have enough money to feed my family. I was a high profile' lawyer with a good reputation. People trusted me. I could get away with anything. My husband was a bit of a playboy and I knew he would never choose me over a group of women, so I took advantage of that.I used to go out and pick up men for him. I would send him pictures of me with the men I slept with. He would then pay me for my time. The more men I slept with the more money I made. It was a win win situation. Until it wasn't. I started to feel guilty about it. Then I stopped. Who was I fooling?There was no way I could keep doing this and still maintain my perfect marriage. I needed more than that from my husband. I needed him to be a man' not a boy. I needed him to lead our family instead of playing second fiddle to my career. I needed him to take care of me when I was sick and not expect me to take care of him when he was sick.I needed him to be my husband and father of our children. So I continued my little escapade.
I met him again. I saw him on the roof of our building. He was staring at the stars with his hands in his pockets. I wondered what he was thinking about. Was he thinking about his wife and children back home?Was he thinking about his future? Or was he just thinking about his next conquest?
I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself before I approached him. I was going to have to face him sooner or later. Might as well do it while I was dressed and ready to go. So I put on my best dress and headed out the door. I waited for the elevator.When it arrived I stepped into the box and pressed the button for the seventh floor. I knew where I was going. I had been there before. The Penthouse' was the name of the building. It was a place where business men came to relax and unwind after a hard day. They had everything you could want in a hotel room.A big flat screen TV, a mini fridge, and a bathroom with a huge walk in shower. The building itself was impressive. It was a place where you could live your best life without worrying about the outside world. I loved it there. It was my go to place when I needed a break from the stress of work.A man and his wife checked in as I was leaving the elevator.I gave them my best smile and greeted them with my usual 'How can I help you?' They seemed nice. I wondered what kind of trouble they were going to cause. The wife was stunningly beautiful with jet black hair and the husband was good looking in a rugged kind of way. They seemed like the type of people that were going to cause some sort of ruckus.I wondered what they were going to do to make it happen. I also wondered if they were going to have an affair. I had seen enough episodes of Maury Povich to know that cheating was common among celebrities and royals. It was even more common among people with money. So this couple could be anyone. They could be anyone that I knew.I wondered who they were. I wondered what they were going to do to me. You can ask me anything you want,' I said to them. 'I am a lawyer after all. I handle all kinds of cases.Civil, criminal, and family.' I said it like I was selling myself. Like I was the best lawyer in the world. I was. I was better than any of them. That was my line. I used it every time. It got me out of trouble and into bed with whoever I needed to satisfy my needs. They never called my bluff.They never said I couldn't be in bed with them and still be a lawyer. I was always in bed with them. Always. So what kind of trouble are you going to cause me this time?' the husband asked me. His name was Erik. He was a stockbroker. Not that it mattered what he did for a living. All men wanted to be him.I was one of those men. I wanted to be him. I wanted to be that handsome, that strong, that confident. I wanted to be that guy". But I was never that guy. I was always the nerdy lawyer that no one cared about. Except my wife. She loved me no matter my size. Or lack thereof. I was a lucky man. I knew it.I was one of those men. I wanted to be him. I wanted to be that handsome, that strong, that confident. I wanted to be that guy". But I was never that guy. I was always the nerdy lawyer that no one cared about. Except my wife. She loved me no matter my size. Or lack thereof. I was a lucky man. I knew it. asked him. I needed to know. I needed to be prepared. I needed a plan. And I needed it now. He was looking at me expectantly. Waiting for my answer. I had to give him something.Anything. I couldn't just leave him hanging. I had to give him a reason to stay. To keep coming back for more. I had to make him want me. I could do that. I had done it before. With other men. I could do it with him. I just needed to figure out what he wanted from me. And what I could give him.Then we would be set."So how much is she paying you per week Mr. Schmidt?" I told him nothing. Nothing at all. Because nothing was what I wanted from him. "Do you have any idea how much I wish I could pay you for that beautiful body of yours? How much I would love to be able to take you on as a client? was what I wanted from him. "Do you have any idea how much I wish I could pay you for that beautiful body of yours? How much I would love to be able to take you on as a client?What kind of case might we win together?" My voice trailed off as thoughts of being tied up and spanked crossed my mind. Then I swallowed hard and said, "No sir. I don't know what kind of case you and your wife would win together. But I do know that you are one lucky man to have such a beautiful wife.One so loyal." Then I kissed her hand. Tenderly touched her face. Nodded my head towards hers. Kissed her again. She is mine. I own her. She is my wife. End of story. And I am going to prove it to you. Now hand me your keys and I will let you watch me undress.After all, I owe you one."
You want me to watch you undress? Why? What do you want me to do while you do it? And why do you think I won't tell your wife what you do in your free time?'' I asked him.''Why must everything be a competition between us? Must our lives revolve around each other's pleasure? Can't you see that when two people work together they are stronger? More powerful? Surely you understand that a man and his wife working together can accomplish anything.No need for extra help when you already have everything you need right here in this room. I watched him intently as he stripped down naked. The more I looked at him the more I wanted him. He was big. Really big. But that just made him sexy. I wanted him so badly it was painful. And I knew I was being greedy. Greedy for what he had.For control over him. Over their relationship.
Heavens, I am such a pervert. But I can help it. I am built that way. It is in my nature to be like this. This is how I have been since I was a child.Like father like son...and daughter too! When daddy took care of me after mommy left us both alone I felt special. Mommy used to say I was her princess. Even when I was little I knew I was different. And I liked it. I still do. Being different is what I live for. I have always been different. My parents never understood me.They thought I should fit into society but instead I became part of its devolution. Different doesn't mean bad or wrong. In fact, there isn t anything wrong with being different. Just look at our president. He is different. And we love him for it. Right, America? So what if I am a little different? So what if I like it rough?A bit kinky even? Who doesn't these days? Everyone has some sort of fetish or fantasy that makes them unique. We should celebrate that instead of trying to fit into someone else's mold. And what is wrong with a little role play now and then? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. It gives us something to talk about besides the weather and how the stock market is doing.Plus it makes things exciting. Like today when Jack came home early because his flight got canceled due to thunderstorms. Instead of sitting through another dinner where I had to pretend I was enjoying myself I suggested we play a little game. He agreed and we ended up in the bedroom where I pretended to be a secretary and he pretended to be my boss.That turned into him pretending to fire me which led to him kissing me and eventually taking my job away from me. As long as we were playing along it was fun. And hot. And a little sad. Because I loved my job. I loved going to work. Even though I was paid miserably I felt fulfilled. Until he took it away from me. Now I feel useless.Unloved. Totally and completely unwanted by anyone who matters. Except my husband. Thank God for my husband. Without whom none of this would matter he said to me one day when I was crying because no one cared for me. He held me close and told me I was beautiful. That he loved me. It made me feel better.Until he took away my job and my self-esteem. Now I feel ugly. And stupid. And worthless. But that is what happens when you are cheated on. You lose yourself. You become nothing more than a shell for someone’s pleasure. And when they are finished with you they throw you away like yesterday’s trash. Or in my case yesterday’s secretary.But that is the life of a secretary. Or at least that is what I have come to understand through my years of experience. The life of a secretary is never her own. It is always someone else’s. Her boss, her co-workers, and most of all her client. She is there to serve their needs. Not her own.It is a sad truth but one I have come to terms with. I am a secretary. And I am good at my job. I am not beautiful" or "talented" but I am competent. Which is all I have ever been good at. And that is all I have ever needed. So far.But what will happen if I ever lose that? What will happen if I ever get fired? Or worse yet, what will happen if one of my clients decides he doesn't like me and cancels my appointment without notice? That is what happened to my last boss. He was a jerk and I told him so. In fact, I told him everything.How he could go fuck himself. How he could take a long walk off a short pier. How he could shove his job up his ass and resign with dignity. Instead he screamed at me and made me cry. And that is when I quit. I walked out of his office and never looked back. My last day was spent sending out resumes and looking for another job.That is when I met my husband. My new boss. My new life.My new beginning.
Chapter 2
I have always loved men. I have always wanted to be with them. Not in a sexual way. That would be gross. But in a platonic way.I have always wanted to be one of them. To belong. To be part of something. That is why I joined the Secretaries Club. It a club for secretaries. Not because I wanted to fuck them. Although some of them were attractive. Mostly they were homely. But that is what makes them attractive. It is the fact that they are not trying to be someone else.They are just themselves. And that is sexy. And attractive. And I have always loved that about men. Even the ones I have slept with. They are just themselves. And that is sexy.So far I have only fucked one of them. But I have been with many more. Some of em have been great. Some of'em have been assholes. But all of'em have been men. And I have loved them all. Except my husband. He is the only one I have ever hated.With every fiber of my being I hate him. Hated him since the moment he showed up late for our date. Made me look bad in front of my colleagues. Made me look bad in front of my husband. Made me look bad in front of myself. And he did it on purpose. Hell, he did it on the first date.He knew exactly how much shit he can get away with because everyone thinks I'm crazy anyway.He knows people think I am a freak. Well, freak' is a bit strong. I am not a freak. But I am different. And that is all I have ever been. Different. Not better or worse. Just different.And that is all I have ever wanted.For people to accept me for how I am instead of wanting me to change to fit into society's mold.To love me despite my flaws. To be there for me when I need them no matter how small my problem is. To laugh with me when I make a fool of myself. To cry with me when I can't stop thinking about my mother and how she has abandoned me.To kiss me when I am feeling lonely. To hold me when I am feeling scared. To cuddle me when I am cold. To listen to me when I talk about my dreams and wishful thinking. To give me what I want in bed. And more. I want them all. But I don’t want them to see me as different.I don’t want them to see me as someone who needs help. Because that is what I have been told I am. A freak. Freak' is a word I have heard my whole life. From my parents. From my teachers. From everyone. And it is a word I have used to describe myself many times. Until now.I have decided that I don't want to be called a freak anymore. Because I am not a freak. I am not strange. I am different and that is all I have ever been. And that is all I have ever wanted.Until now.
Chapter 3
I have always been a bit of a stutterer. Not a big deal until you are trying to seduce someone. Then it is a big deal. My husband has never noticed. Or at least he has never said anything about it. Which I find strange. Because I stutter when I get nervous. And I get nervous a lot.Especially when I am around men. Especially when I am around my husband.Because I have a thing for men. I have a thing for their hands he stroked his beard "and their forearms. The way they hold themselves. The way they look at me. It is a turn on. And I am sure it is a turn on for them too. So why has he never noticed?I don't know. Maybe he has and just doesn't say anything. Maybe it is just me. Maybe I am making it all up in my head. But I doubt it. Because there are times when I feel his hands on my waist. His fingers entwined with mine. And I can feel his body pressed against me. He pulls me close. Tenderly.And I melt. Because I know he wants me. He wants me so badly. And I want him too. So badly.I want him to fuck me. To feel me. To know I want him. That I have been fantasizing about him for years. Long before we met. Long before I worked for him. And I have been doing a lot of fantasizing lately.Because I haven't been getting what I want in real life. So I have been doing a lot of imagining. And lately I have been doing a lot of thinking. A lot of thinking about my future. About what I want my future to look like. And it has been a lot of thinking about my past as well. About who I was before I met my husband.And who I am now. And I have come to the realization that I have been lying to myself for years. That I have been living a lie that everything is okay. That nothing has changed.Except me. I have changed. And everything has changed.My marriage has been strained for years. Ever since his best friend moved in with us. The bastard took my husband away from me.And then he took my husband's best friend away from him.I was left alone. With my thoughts. With my fantasies. With my husband's best friend. And that bastard has been playing on my mind for years. And I have been letting him. Because I am a sucker. A big fucking sucker. And I have been giving him what he wants without realizing it.Because I have been thinking with my pussy. And my pussy has been telling me everything is okay. Even though my heart knows it isn't. Even though every time I look at my husband I wonder if he is cheating on me. Or if his best friend is. Or if both of them are with that whore that lives down the street.And then I think about my mother and how she has been lying to me for years. How she has been fucking that man for years. And then I think about my father and how he has been sleeping with that woman for years. And what they have been doing to me. Making me watch. Participating. And I have been letting them do it. Because I am a pervert.And I love it.I love watching them together. I love seeing my father fuck that woman. I love seeing my mother suck that man's cock and I love being part of it. Even though I am the one getting fucked. Even though I am the one having my pussy licked. Even though I am the one having my tits played with.I love it all. I love watching them together. I love them fucking me. I love feeling their hands on me. I love feeling their tongues exploring my body. Exploring my pussy. And I love the way they talk to me. Like I am a person. Like I have feelings. And they are right. I do have feelings.