Chapter 1: Introduction
Sex. Everyone had it, everyone talked about it—but why did it feel so taboo between them? Kai rolled over onto his back, sweat trickling down his temples as he stared at the ceiling. His heart thudded wildly within his chest, and his skin prickled with awareness. He couldn't shake the memory of Jaekyung's hands on his hips, his warm mouth trailing down Kai's neck to lick at the pulse point. He wanted more.
He needed more. Sex was the only thing he could think about, and every fiber of his being ached for release. But he knew they couldn't keep going like this; eventually, someone would get hurt. The guilt gnawed at him every moment he spent in bed next to Jaekyung, their breaths intermingling in the darkness. It felt wrong to crave something so intensely without being able to give it back in kind.
But what if he could? What if there was some way he could show Jaekyung how much he cared, how much he loved him?
Kai's thoughts swirled like a hurricane inside his head, battering against each other until one crystallized into a plan. He sat up abruptly, grabbing his phone from the bedside table and pulling up a search engine. A hundred tabs later, he had a rough outline of what he wanted to do for Jaekyung.
Would he be ok with this? Kai wondered. It was a lot to ask of anyone, let alone someone he shared everything with already.
But there was no turning back now; Kai set his jaw and pressed play on the video he had found. The screen flickered to life, displaying two figures tangled together in a messy expanse of sheets. The woman arched her back, throwing her head back in ecstasy as the man thrust into her with unrestrained passion. Kai's heart pounded in his ears, and his palms broke out into a cold sweat. This was it - the moment he had been waiting for, bated breath, since he had realized he wasn't straight after all.
A surge of adrenaline rushed through his veins as he watched the two people on the screen, their bodies twisting and contorting in a tangle of passion. Kai couldn't tear his eyes away from the sight; it was like watching a live performance of something he had only ever imagined before.
Jaekyung stirred beside him, mumbling something incoherent in his sleep. Kai shook his head to dispel the thought that he should tell him what was going on.
No, he couldn't ruin this surprise. He had planned it all out meticulously, leaving nothing to chance. He had even gone out and bought new lingerie for himself, something he had never done before, just to make sure everything was perfect. Jaekyung deserved the best, after all.
With every ounce of courage he could muster, Kai climbed off the bed and slipped out of the room, leaving his best friend sleeping soundly behind him.