Chapter 1: Introduction
My name is Rachma ‒ a modern day Muslim woman, born and bred in the vibrant and diverse capital of Indonesia, Jakarta. My colleagues would praised me as "beautiful," with a warm and gentle smile that often draws people in, they always said I'm such a graceful hijab woman with soft-spoken voice and exuding an aura of calm.
My slender figure wrapped in my modest but elegant Muslim dress that moves gracefully whenever I walk, my dark brown hair, coiled inside a white hijab, adding a touch of exotic allure to my overall looks, making me the epitome of elegance and beauty.
I'm married with a loving and caring husband, Ibrahim, a hardworking man who's doing his best to support me. We've been married for five years, despite having no kids but our marriage is something I've cherished. it's full of love, affection and respect for each other. The way he looks at me and takes care of me gives me so much warmth.
To spend time when Ibrahim busy for works, I'm continue my study for master in psychology, It helps to keep me occupied and to spend my time meaningfully. That's why many people who knows me always said I'm a perfect woman, a beautiful and pious woman with her hijab, well-educated, carrying herself with grace and poise.
However, there is one secret I've been keeping from my husband. I had a unique and unconventional sexual attraction to men who were considered unattractive by society's standards. Some might have called them "ugly," but to me, they each possessed a distinct and compelling allure.
Their rugged and rough exterior, their unconventional looks, and their strong personalities allured me.
Maybe the contrast of their 'ugliness' and harsh worldly persona against my delicate beauty, and my soft, modest personality played a role in my fascination. I always dreaming how if me a pious and the graceful hijab-wearing woman get dominated by a rough man, the thrill and excitement of being in control and also out of control at the same time would be arousing.
But I'm well aware of how inappropriate, even taboo, this secret desire of mine is in my inner heart, considering my religious upbringing and I'm always struggling to maintain my faith and my longing.
However, one day, my inner struggle would be challenged by the unexpected encounter with a man named Tarjo. A construction worker hired for repairing some part of our house after a rainstorm that caused some damage.
He was rough around the edges and solidly built with dark brown skin, which has a certain rawness to it, and a yellow teeth that far from the media's definition of attractiveness, but there was a strength in his features that I found intriguing.
As Tarjo working to fixed some parts of my house, his body being damp and sweating from labor, revealing the sweat droplets trickling down his thick, hard muscle and left me with a strange feeling in my chest, a desire to explore this attraction that I couldn't quite comprehend.
During my breaks from studying and observing him, we found ourselves caught up in light-hearted conversations while he worked. The conversations flowed easily, and I found myself opening up and speaking with him more candidly than I would with others.
There was something about him that put me at ease, allowing me to let my guard down. Tarjo is a funny guy, always cracking jokes that would make me laugh even though oftenly his jokes is inappropriate, and somehow, I found his daring and unfiltered personality refreshing. Even oftenly I respond his inappropriate jokes with light responses and playful banter, as I was curious to see where our conversations would lead.
"Mba Rachma your voice was cute when you laughed, it must be arousing hearing you moans with such a cute voice hehehe" Pak Tarjo said jokingly.
"Did you brave enough to make me moans huh? I'll tell you to my husband hihihi" I replied playfully. I could feel the blush creeping up my cheeks as I said it, but I was enjoying the light-hearted back-and-forth with Tarjo. It was a welcome change from the seriousness of my daily life.
Tarjo just grinned and said: "Oh it's up to you Mba Rachma, if you give me a permission, I certainly brave to make you moans hehehe" The flirtatious banter seemed to ignite a spark within me. A spark that I had never felt before. I was intrigued by this newfound desire that Tarjo had awakened within me.
"Are you sure you brave enough? ah you must be just talking hihihi" I respond, knowing full well that I was playing with fire. But there was something about Tarjo that made me feel emboldened, as if I could push the boundaries of what was considered appropriate in this context.
Tarjo just chuckled and replied, "You'll never know unless you try Mba Rachma." His words lingered in the air, an unspoken challenge between us.
As the days passed, my fascination with Tarjo only grew stronger.
Every time I saw him working at my house, my body would react in ways that I couldn't quite understand. I found my pussy itching and the temperature of my body would rise, leaving me in a constant state of discomfort and arousal.
It seems Pak Tarjo noticed what I'm feeling, he started to working shirtless , his sweaty muscles allured me.
He would playfully tease me, saying that he could tell how much I wanted him just by looking at me.
And it was true, it was as if I couldn't hide the desire that was coursing through my veins.
It was wrong, and I knew it was wrong, but I couldn't help myself, the thrill of doing something forbidden made me wet, I knew it was wrong but I couldn't resist my desire.